I get frequent comments on my gym bag, so I wasn’t surprised today when the nice looking 20-something guy in the locker room said “you’ve got a nice bag”. 
“They make all the cool stuff for kids” is my usual reply, because it’s true. I really like my Sponge Bob bag, and the only thing that could make me give it up would be perhaps a really nice Mojo Jojo bag, or an especially deserving friend who would effectively be going steady with me after a gift of that magnitude.
I suppose it’s normal that people will talk to me in the locker room, because I work pretty fast and hard in the gym itself, and 
if you wanted to say something to me, then the locker room is your only chance. I don’t go to the gym to socialize, although I like what I perceive of most of the people there. Incidentally, for you single guys out there, this is a very bad place to meet girls. There are very few in there working out, and the ones who are there seem to be pretty much just like me: they work hard, and aren’t there to socialize.
Of these conversations in the locker room, they pretty much all seem to take place while I am completely naked. I’ve spent a great deal of my adult life basically naked all day
, and by now the condition is pretty unremarkable to me. So I was (only slightly) taken aback when the young guy followed up his bag comment with “and you’ve got a terrific body”. Umm…”thank you!” But not wanting our conversation to end awkwardly, I added some fatherly advice that it’s important to start early, because “it’s much harder once you’ve got a family and kids”, after which he scurried on out the door.
My last naked locker room conversation was actually more uncomfortable. A guy about my age struck up a conversation right after I’d undressed, and he was pretty skilled at casual conversation that was obviously going to lead to something else. Luckily, I didn’t have to wait for it long, because I smelled pretty bad and really needed to shower and get back to work. We finally got around to his line of business, which was insurance, which he wanted to sell me, which made the whole thing easier. This is what is great about business cards: once you ask someone like that to give you one, the meeting is pretty much over. You can both go on your ways, just don’t ever give them one of your cards (I’m sorry, I don’t have one of my cards right now because I’m completely naked.) in return.
Last big swim of the week tomorrow, then I’m forced to take Saturday off because of work. Going to be able to do some family laps on Sunday if everyone’s in the mood, as it will be a day off. I’ve realized that I need to continue sharing my prostate’s adventures with you, so tomorrow I’ll tell you about the only time in my life I’ve been naked in a room with two women at the same time. All for the sake a research.
My Name is SCHOOLS 